Its normal to have insecurities. And me, I admit that I have tons of insecurities in me. I always feel that I am not good enough. I always look down on myself. You name it, I'm fat, I sometimes see myself as an ugly child, I don't have good hair and skin, I HAVE A DAMN WEIRD VOICE, which people always tease me off. Believe me, people have criticized me a lot,both intentionally and unintentionally. My past experiences with people and life, affects my confident a lot. And I grew up as a quite and shy person. I am not confident of myself at all. And now, the environment I'm in, acquires me to have confidence in myself, outspoken attitude, smart, talents, and I really have a lot to improve in myself.
To those who think I am not thankful of what God has given me, I do appreciate what God has given me and I am thankful for everything. But sometimes, it just hits me. When I see other beautiful people, I feel envious of them. Why aren't I like those beautiful girls? I too want to feel good about myself. People would say, there are people much more worst than me, but I feel that that is not the problem here. Once again, it all goes back down to my insecurities.
Maybe in the end, I just need a special someone to tell me that I'm beautiful, just the way I am. But then again, I do not have a special someone. I have never had one. Without me noticing, I am such a lonely girl. Although I am blessed with loving family and friends, but love from a special guy would feel totally different. When will I ever have the chance to love someone, and be loved back? I am still waiting patiently for that someone to enter my life. InsyaAllah, I will meet him soon. :)
listened to the sweet sound @ 6:15 AM
Monday, August 16, 2010 ♥
OH MY GOD!! my blog is pheww.. getting dusty here.. *coughs* hahahahaaa. so dramatic.. okay im probably talking to myself. but nevermind. ANYWAYS, LUCIFER HAS BEEN PLAYING IN MY LAPTOP, IPOD, AND ANYWHERE YOU CAN IMAGINE. im like so......... ADDICTED to this song, BADLY. awww SHINee , i will always support you till the end of time. HAHAH! ok if i were to start spazzing about SHINee, it will NEVER end. xD
so yeahh, i should probably update about school and other things going on. well, the school semester has just ended. new class next semester. im so gonna miss E24P. the first class i had in RP. :( will definitely cherish the moments we had together. i feel sad all of a sudden. :( awwww... we shall meet up soon guys, WE SHALL KEEP IN TOUCH! :D
enough of that, lets talk about PASSION baby!! im sure everyone as their own passion and interests. and i should say, my babies(SHINee ;P) has opened the door for me to DANCE. i am sooooooooooooo in love with dancing and am in the process of upgrading myself. so, tomorrow, booking a dance studio near raffles. will be practising with azura bestie!!! , wawa and aai !! :D well, besides the fact that its fasting month, i hope to have fun tmr with them! :) im so looking forward!! HEHEHE!!
alright, till the next post!! :) ps. i miss STA'rt camp and the feeling i had for someone i met there.
listened to the sweet sound @ 3:12 PM
Sunday, July 11, 2010 ♥
Sweet love song. I keep replaying it. I don't really know whats Love. I wonder if i really will meet my true love one day. I've been dreaming about having someone speacial in my life who i can share it with. I feel so empty. I need someone right now. But i keep telling myself, that its not really the right time. I guess i'll just have to wait. and wait.. and wait..
But the same old story has repeated itself. I've met you. And soon you'll go away, like the rest. But I love the way you carry yourself. I love your confidence. I love what you do. I love your roses. I love your hugs. But i can't seem to reach out to you. Nevertheless, i shall stay happy and just be myself. I know that im not the one to get too involved or bothered of these kind of stuff.
Tomorrow's school. Meaning, another week of school. Another week of LEOs. Another week of working hard. Goodnight all. :)
listened to the sweet sound @ 9:54 PM
Sunday, June 27, 2010 ♥
okayy it has been ages since i've updated this blog of mine. i really have no time to manage it anymore. :( busy with school. busy with family. busy life. i don't think i have any readers anymore. thats for sure. hahah. so basically, im like talking to myself now. but i know yanah will probably read this one. THIS IS A SHOUTOUT FOR U YANAH! =P she has been pestering me to update this blog of mine. -_- and oh! i've just noticed that my tagboard is flooded with advertisements. WTH?! why would they want to post advertisement at a dead blog?? its so irritating can?!! -____-
but oh wells.. shall not get fired up just because of this. so im gonna update about what has been happening in my life now :) firstly, i'll like to talk about schooling in Republic Polytechnic. can i say that i kinda LOVE that school? but i dont really knw the reason? HAHAHAHHAAA. but i most definitely know that friends are a big part of my life in rp. so to all my friends in rp , GOD BLESS YOU GUYS! ;) thanks for making my life here in rp worthwhile~
hmmmm.. but i've been thinking alot about love lately. since i've stepped into rp, i can say, i've only had fallen in love once. but that only lasted for 2 weeks because something or should i say someone, just HAD to butt in? -_- oh but whose to blame? im not really sure myself. so since then, i would say that im scared to fall in love right now. and thats why, i dont have feelings for anyone at the moment. WHICH IS SO BORING. hahahahaah!! xD its not like im desperate or anything but i just feel so empty sometimes. ahhh crap nevermind. i shall just enjoy this life without a guy at the moment :)
hmmmmm... i don't think theres anything new to update. i still love SHINee, i still have dimples, and im still myself :) till the next update u guysss.. have a great day. take care. ;)
listened to the sweet sound @ 8:04 PM
Sunday, May 9, 2010 ♥
back with another post! =D
as promised, every weekend, i'll update this blog of mine kayyzz.
so friday night, went to TP jam & hop. yeahh tp! and im from rp!
but who caresssss?! HAHAHAHA.
actually the main purpose was to meet sweethearts there! ^^
misss yaaa guys! u know who u are!
and for the jam n hop itself, it was a BLAST!
but i thought that rp's jam n hop was wayy better! ;)
GO RP! hahahahahah!
kay so as usual, party like mad. totally sweating man.. haha!
but it was all WORTH IT!
i can't go clubbing cuz im underaged. so if got events like this, i'll definitely go!!! oh but if im not underaged also, i'll not go clubbing cuz im a good girl.
kayy so on saturday, had an advanced mother's day celebration.
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY IBU!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU FROM THE DEEPEST OF MY HEART!! xD
thanks for everything that you've done for me.
i promise i'll try my best to be a good daughter and find a good son in law for you.
kayy so my family, pak su and nenek went to Swensens to celeb!!
awesome food + awesome cake + awesome family = AWESOME DAY SPENT! ;D
so today, woke up and went to Macdonalds for breakfast.
i swear it has been AGESSSS since i went macdonalds for breakfast.
i soooo love the hotcakes lahh pleaseee!! hahahaha!! >.<
oh i havent revise for UT. haizzzzz...
well, its not till this friday, so.. i think im gonna chill for awhile.
alrights. till the next post.
LOVE YOU PEOPLE! LOVE SHINEE! >.<
listened to the sweet sound @ 5:38 PM
Friday, April 30, 2010 ♥
woooooooooohooooooooo !! and its the weekend again baybehhhh!! :D hmmm... so 2 weeks of school has already past just like that. and im so lovin school so far. well its basically because of the people lah. =D E24P ROCKSZZSSZZXXZZ!! ^^
k anyways, im addicted to this song currently:
well basically, we used this song for the hip hop ig auditions. oh the audition was damn fun laa. dance here dance there. but the second part of the choreography which is b-boy ? somewhat like breakdance? its killer man!! its super fast laa.. -_- but i think i did okayy? monday is the results of the audition. OMG IM SO NERVOUS!! o.O k whatever! ~
i shall enjoy the weekends after a tiring week. =) u guys should too. and i think im sleeping soon. GOODNIGHT SWEETHEARTS!
listened to the sweet sound @ 11:39 PM
Saturday, April 24, 2010 ♥
and im BACK with another update!! :D sorry if im like lacking in my updates. well, currently,im busy with school! =) 1st week just passed by and im TOTALLY loving Republic Poly and THE PEOPLE!!! who says rp sucks? WHO BLOODY SAYS THAT?! -___- well for me, RP is AWESOME. hahahaa. you just need to work hard thats all. haha. well, made ALOT of friends since orientation =] im loving them all.. heheheee..
so yeahhh,i've just signed up for Hip Hop IG and im totally excited for my auditions next thursday!! :D but im also quite nervous though =/ i really2 want to be in hip hop IG. on the day of auditions, we're gonna learn a choreography and we'll dance as a group. and i think we're gonna do freestyle too?? well, whatever happens, happens. but im gonna try my best!! oh yeahh, so i've decided if we're gonna do freestyle, im gonna do abit of this if they allow us to choose our own song. since im first inspired by SHINee to dance, im gonna use SHINee's song and dance! the good thing is, i know the dance steps already! only need to do abit of touching up here and there. so... ALL THE BEST TO ME!! :D
listened to the sweet sound @ 8:49 PM
♥ that rockstar
Suppppp'~ The name's NurulAmirah♪
Remember 11th February 1993 , Sweet Seventeen
And Im not your average girl, don't judge me.
Music is my lover♥
SHINee are my Romeos♥